Seriously? I Actually Thought That?

22 Days Remaining

I just want you to know that I wrote other blogs tonight but I just can't push "publish".  Can't do it.  So, I'll start from scratch.

I'll fill you in on the theme though.  You don't always get what you want.  (Yes, I know this is a song lyric.) OR what you think you're going to get.

Let's take a look at some things I thought would happen VS. what actually happened.

I thought I would seem older at 40 
Boom!  Totally better than expected. Go me!

I thought I'd be more comfortable in my own skin.
Nope, just as freaked out as ever, doing better though.

I thought I would have a house I loved.
I want to burn my house down.

I thought I would have sweet, quiet, and smart children.
They are both super smart. 

I thought I would have a swimming pool with the Budweiser logo painted on the bottom.
This was the stupidest thing I ever thought.  Also, Budweiser is terrible.

I thought I would be married.
Divorced.

I thought I'd have more money.
A career change at 40 is super smart.

I thought I wasn't a wine drinker.
Second stupidest thing I ever thought.

I thought I would join the Peace Corp
Clearly, I didn't do anything that cool....yet.

I thought I'd be a world traveler.
Damn it!   

I thought I was so smart.
The older I get the more I realize I know very little. (But I am SO much smarter now.)

I thought my parents would stop worrying about me.
Seriously guys?


Tonight, I'll think about me in 20 years.  This time I'll be less specific and just say,

"I think I'll be awesome."