My Big Break At Age 6

I wrote an entire blog about worrying today.  Then I hit save and decided to share it another day.  I just feel compelled to write about something else.

I suppose one of the first things to go when you get older could be your memory.  Short-term, I can agree with.  I have sticky notes everywhere and an iPhone full of reminders.  However, I've always had an incredible long-term memory. Sure, it might not be what it used to be, but I have memories from ages 2 and 3. Obviously cloudy, but still real.

In the past I used to think I had an ultra-special brain; super capable and ready to lock things in. Now I realize it might have to do with how I perceived these events. You see, I am a highly sensitive person and I have always deeply tied emotion to life's events.  Some might say (and did) that I'm overly emotional.  (Perhaps they meant overly- awesome....maybe?) My memories evoke such powerful feelings.  Some sad, some fantastic. It's the way you feel about something that locks it into your brain....or maybe heart.

My friend Ellen loves to ask people what they were like in Kindergarten.  What you loved then,  gives you insight to where you should go now.  Interesting.  Ask yourself that question. You might be surprised.

As you may have guessed, I totally remember.  Here's one of my favorite memories.

I went to a tiny school in Rosalie, Nebraska.  The entire school was probably 100 kids. K-12. Around the holidays my teacher, Miss Boyer, asked Stephanie, Anna, and I to be angels for the Christmas program. Oh, the joy! I can feel the exhilaration now!  I was about to have my big break! Me, Playing one of the Charlie's Angels. Unbelievable!  

I finally figured it out when mom started sewing my pink smock and wings.  I'd be playing a dorky angel from heaven, not a gun carrying, foxy lady. Dammit!

I'm still carrying that dream around.  The day I get my big break.  I know exactly how it will feel.  Such a lovely thought. I've been a lot of different people between ages 6 and 40.  I suddenly feel like I returned home. Grateful.

Big kindness of the day: 

I cleaned up and organized the magazines and toys at the Dr.'s office.  I just love making things look nice.  I also loved the surprise on other people's faces. Maybe they'll help out next time.